Our Story
By the time we're married in August, we'll have been together (officially) for eight years. Our story together, however, starts far before that. From our first encounter all the way up to "I do", below is our little love story, as told by Charles (and approved by Kristen).
2013 • SAN FRANCISCO
"Let's go say what's up to my friend. She's cool, I think you'll like her."* That's how I recall my friend Jamal setting up the first encounter. Jamal and Kristen became good friends over the summer during their work training and made plans to meet up while Kristen was home for the holidays. It was New Year's Eve and Kristen was in San Francisco to run a few errands downtown (returning things, per usual). At the same time, I was visiting Jamal in San Francisco and we were also downtown (desperately shopping for outfits). Thinking nothing of it, Jamal led us to the basement of Urban Outfitters and that's where I met Kristen for the first time.
Most of that day is a blur now, but we spent much of it together running errands around the city. At one point, Kristen lent me her portable phone charger, which I remember fondly. We think there might've been something there. She says she took note of my hearty laugh and still remembers what I was wearing and I couldn't help but take interest in her smile and infectious joy. Timing wasn't right for a next step though - I was focused on surviving my finance job back home in D.C. while Kristen lived in Boston and was already in a relationship. After the last errand, we said our goodbyes, unsure if we'd ever run into each other again.
*It was actually more along the lines of "Let's go say what's good to my homegirl. She's icy, I think you'll rock with her."
LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT?
2014 • WASHINGTON, D.C.
THE REUNION
A year later, a lot had changed for both of us. I finally quit my finance job and was traveling before moving to San Francisco. Kristen was still in Boston, but newly single and contemplating a move back home as well. One late night in October, I logged onto Facebook and saw it was Kristen's birthday, so I wrote on her wall to wish her a happy birthday. Moments later, I got a notification - it was Kristen responding to the post letting me know she'd be in D.C. around the time I would be back from my trip. We exchanged a few messages and did end up hanging out together with friends a few weeks later. It was a fun night (shout out to Pauly's housewarming) and it felt as if we'd been friends our whole lives. We talked about my dreams and plans for my move to the Bay Area and Kristen says she remembers me saying "I hope I find a girl from Oakland when I move" and just laughing it off.
A second reunion happened a month later. I was now living in SF and Kristen was on another one of her holiday trips home. I met up with her and her best friends at (our beloved) 1015 Folsom and again, had another fun night out together. This time, though, we both realized the connection might've been deeper than friendship and our feelings for each other started to grow.
2015 • SF - BoSTON
One text message led to another ten texts, which led to another thousand texts, phone calls, and FaceTimes. We stayed in touch and loved talking about everything we had on our minds – our favorite foods, favorite music, restaurant recommendations, upbringings and experiences, aspirations, you name it. The connection was growing stronger by the day, with only distance separating us (a theme that would define the relationship for years).
Kristen visited home a few times that spring, kicking off a series of dates – our first meal together at Nopalito, a treacherous hike up Claremont in Berkeley, and a fancy dinner at State Bird Provisions. One afternoon outside my office, I finally mustered up the courage to give Kristen a kiss (politely asking her permission first). It was the happiest I had been up until that point.
(A LOT OF) TALKING
2015 • MONTRÉAL
By this point, we were the only thing on each other's minds. The topics of conversation became all the more serious, switching between our favorite foods to our potential future together. We desperately wanted to spend more time with each other, so we planned our first big trip: one that would take our relationship the distance, both literally and figuratively. It started in D.C. where I introduced Kristen to my closest friends and favorite spots. Next was Boston, where Kristen would return the favor with hers. The final stop, of course, was Montréal for Osheaga Music Festival. The city became the emotional and spiritual foundation of our relationship. It was a quiet morning on August 1, 2015 when I nervously asked Kristen to be my girlfriend, to which she happily agreed. A day later, we looked each other in the eyes and both said "I love you". We had felt it all along.
MAKING IT OFFICIAL
2015 - 2016 • BAY AREA, CA
Kristen always planned on moving back to the Bay, but I like to think I was a big reason she did it so soon. We were finally living in the same city together and our relationship was quickly taken to new heights. We were practically inseparable and spent all of our time together. I showed Kristen the places in the city that I grew to love that she had not experienced before – Alamo Square, Falletti, fancy omakase, and late night Seniore's Pizza. Kristen introduced me to everything beautiful about California – Los Pericos burritos, the Central Coast, Oakland First Fridays, and tomato beef chow mein. Everything felt right and we lived in the moment. We were truly falling in love and didn't think anything could stop us.
LIFE IN CALIFORNIA
2016 • BETWEEN SF & NYC
DREAMS & NIGHTMARES
We fell in love partly because of our ambitions. We both had lofty dreams that the other wanted to support however possible. For Kristen, one of those dreams was to live in New York and it just so happened that there was a work opportunity to make the move. It was a hard decision and a lot to consider, but she ultimately knew what was right for her. I was shocked when she told me her plans. I mean, she had just moved back to the West Coast and our relationship was just beginning! There was never a question of whether I'd support her though and we vowed to make it work, no matter what. After a year of being in the Bay Area together, Kristen packed her bags and made her way to the East Coast again, this time to New York, propelling the relationship back to the long distance nightmare that it started as.
2017 - 2019 • BETWEEN DC & NYC
LONG DISTANCE
The next three years of long distance defined our relationship and tested our limits of love and sacrifice. Truthfully, I struggled to balance my personal life with the responsibilities of a long distance relationship, while Kristen was trying to dive into a brand new city and job. In an attempt to get closer, but still not emotionally (or financially) prepared to move to New York, I moved back to the DMV. We became regulars on the infamous Eastern Chinatown bus between D.C. and NYC (we vow to never ride that bus again) and we saw the world together – Hawai'i, Tunisia, Paris, Singapore, India, and Amsterdam. However, this chapter of long distance was by far the most challenging as we constantly faced the realities of growth, both as individuals and as a unit. Through all the bumps, we stood firm in our love for each other because we knew that's what would carry us through to make things work.
2019 • NEW YORK CITY
TOGETHER AT LAST
At times, it didn't feel like there was an end in sight with long distance, but the universe had other plans. I was laid off from my job in D.C. and took it as an opportunity to finally move to New York. After months of interviewing, along with the consistent back-and-forth trips between cities that we had grown accustomed to, I landed a dream job moved to New York in April 2019. We agreed to live separately and not move in together for the first year, as we didn't want too many major life changes at once. I found a cozy apartment in Bed Stuy, while Kristen remained in Chinatown. What was once 3,000 miles of distance that eventually became 300 miles, was now, finally, just 3 miles.
2020 • BED STUY, NY
(COVID) ROOMMATES
Everything felt right in the world! We were together again, enjoying all the great things New York had to offer as we entered this next chapter of our lives. We found ourselves in a routine of spending quality time together while balancing work and personal lives. Then, of course, the world stopped. Oddly, COVID-19 was a blessing that brought us closer. As everyone isolated in their own worlds and social lives were reduced to nothing, the only commitment we had was to each other. We were given back the uninterrupted, quality time that we had missed the past three years. With public transportation basically shut down, we spent our weeks walking 4.5 miles and crossing the Manhattan Bridge to each other between Chinatown and Bed Stuy. It's true that being in a relationship during the pandemic is like putting it through hyper speed. We felt closer than ever before and said enough is enough – it's time to be roommates. So in August 2020, we finally moved in together.
2021 • OAKLAND, CA
Will You MARRY ME?
When you know, you know. And over the next year, I came to know for certain. I think it's easy to find love in the bright moments, but the deepest love is found when we're at our darkest and lowest points. Our lives were turned upside down when Kristen's father passed away in February 2021. From then on, nothing else in the world mattered besides being there for each other. We entered a stage of our relationship where we fully understood the strength and depth of our love, as well as the resilience it inspired. On September 10, 2021, in front of family and friends, I proposed to Kristen in her childhood home at sunset, with Mr. Low shining down as she said "yes".
2022 • CROWN HEIGHTS, BROOKLYN
Coming back to New York as a newly engaged couple, we felt rejuvenated and ready to take on the world. Kristen has always had crazy ideas, but a particular one stuck: "What if we bought a place in New York so it will always be part of our lives, no matter where life takes us?". A few Streeteasy searches turned into viewings, which turned into contracts, and in January 2022, we became Brooklyn homeowners. We quickly fell in love with our new neighborhood, Crown Heights, and have enjoyed this new chapter of our relationship. We're still exploring, eating, and even running Prospect Park together, yet learning to strike the right balance between time with each other and time to ourselves. This is another chapter of growth for us, but this time, we are absolutely basking in it and loving the beautiful new life that we're creating together. One that will last forever.
NEW HOME, NEW LIFE
2023 • MONTRÉAL, QC
FOREVER & ALWAYS
And that brings us to the present day. Our relationship has gone through more than we could've ever imagined. Sometimes, it's hard to believe that our 24 year-old selves had the determination and confidence that this would last, but we are proud that we did. All of our experiences, both good and bad, have shaped us into the Kristen and Charles that we are today.
Of course, we wouldn't be here without the support of our family and friends – thank you for being part of our love story. We can't wait to celebrate a day that's been a decade in the making and to get married in the city where our relationship started. On August 5, we'll finally get to say "I do". Love can be a tricky thing, but it's beautiful when you find the person that completes you.
Artwork by TJ Rinkoski